Mummy preparing for university, Part II.

Last week I was hit with a wave of emotions about going back to uni, all set off by running into someone I know.
Isn't it funny how it just takes ONE person to ruin the excitement of something you've been looking forward to?

It only takes one person to question yourself!

Am I being selfish?

Jydan will have to miss out on swimming ect, is that fair?

Do I really need to study?

Is it worth leaving Jydan for?

Having a child was so hard for us, yet, here I am, preparing to leave him!

Just a handful of sly remarks, made me question everything.

I was asked if I didn't love him anymore, if I didn't want to look after him anymore!

I was told that the fact that even though it's not 5 days a week, that is just an excuse. So was the fact that I was going to return to work after a year anyway.

They asked Jydan if he wanted to live with her instead and then emphasized what a good mother SHE was. And then ended with an 'i'm only kidding'....... (you could almost imagine, they would be one of those people that say something spitful online and then end their sentence with a kiss)

 I was in too much shock to say much back, but now, do you not know that I blog though?!
That I'll tell the whole world of how judgmental you were!

Can you believe the nerve of some people?!

After being so angry and shocked and amazed at what this person said to me,

The next day left me thinking...

Have I spent enough quality time with Jydan?

I know I've spend 13 months at home, and I know of taught him things, and done quality things, we've done so much craft, but has it been enough?

Have I enjoyed it enough?

Have I made the most of it?

Have I cuddled Jydan enough?

Have I paused and enjoyed the moment?

Have I worried/stressed too much?

I paused for a moment ....

ONE negative person, in a ten minute conversation, had made me question the next 4 or so years of my life! 

Then I found this:

The saying, no matter how much time we'll spend together, it will be still not enough for me. Meant everything for me.

I love this little boy with all my heart, of course I always want to spend more time with him. Who wouldn't?! There will never be enough time in the world, no matter if I'm with him 24/7, or studying three days a week. I will always want more time with him! (most of the time ;) ).

The thing is, Jydan is growing too fast. He is learning too fast. The days are going too fast. The moments go by too quick. I'll always want time to slow down, whether at home, working or studying.

I can still enjoy time, in fact, I will probably cherish time with him even more

Also! Yes I'm a mum! And yes I love my little man more then anything, but I'm also Harley!

I'm aloud to be Harley too. You know I don't love my son any less because I like myself too?

And he won't love me any less!

He won't grow up to say 'Why did you send me to play and learn with other kids my age while you studied to get a career to support our family more? Did you not love me anymore?' 

So why would I listen to someone so inconsiderately rude!

Phew! Now I'm off to choose my subjects for next year which I've been putting off ;)

Mummy preparing for university!

I mentioned in a previous post that I got into uni next year!!

I've wanted to do nursing for a fair few years now and I thought, since I'm not working anyway, I should just apply!

And I got in!!

I start uni, for the second time in my life, in about 2 & 1/2 months... with a toddler in toe!

We've been looking at childcare centre's and found one we absolutely adore that ACTUALLY had a spot for him. It's so hard to find a child care centre with an open spot, let alone your top pick!

So, this child care is very much into the environment. Playing in the environment, nurturing the environment, looking after animals and families, and thriving on imagination.

It makes me more settled about leaving him!

So now that's under the way I'm looking into how to deal with separation anxiety in older babies/toddlers.

I think that will be hard. Jydan hasn't really had the opportunity to be without me. He is a big koala bear!

Some tips I've read and been told by our nurse;

-Don't leave suddenly.

-Let the child know exactly what is happening.

-Don't make a big deal about leaving.

-Don't let them see you get emotional.

-Don't leave without saying goodbye.

I've already ordered Jydan a super cute personalised bag for childcare, I need to get him another drink bottle so he has one for home and one for care. And I want to get some more 'ones&twos' nappies.

Our centre is allowing us to use cloth nappies so I want to bring the easiest cloth nappies. These nappies have tabs like disposables, but are velcro tabs. Instead of the snaps which can be a bit fiddly. I'm going to buy one of the centre hats for him, so he's matching to everyone else - and more likely to keep his hat on. He already has a lunch bag.

The only other thing I have to work on is getting Jydan to drink milk that's not from me! That's not going to well, but we will preserver!

Wow, I can't believe this is happening! I'm so use to our stay-at-home lifestyle now. 

I'm hoping that Jydan can still do his swimming lessons, but I'm not 100 % sure we could still afford it after childcare fees! 

It's so great for him though! That'll be a big thing to weigh up.

I'll have to give up my mums group and playgroup and probably music too! It'll definitely be a change of lifestyle. So I specifically wanted a childcare that would give him though things.

Ugh, I need to prepare for things to get really busy and hectic.

Wish me luck!!

Some Exciting Things Happening In My Life...

It's been SUPER busy in my household. Next year is going to be crazily heactic. So many exciting things happening, some stressful things, I thought I would share them all....

• One of the most EXCITING things is I got into Uni for next year!!!! I will be studying nursing and then will be studying midwifery. I am a little bit worried that I won't be able to handle the study/home life but I'm really looking forward to it. Yey! Go me :D.
  
• This means that Jydan will be starting child care! So we are currently on the look out for a really good centre. (I'm a little picky)
  
  
• Jydan is really battling with gaining weight. He has been like this since he started solids. And last weigh in he lost 300grams! It was the second month in a row he had lost weight so he was sent off for a few tests. He was testing for celiac desease, cystic fibrosis, he had a huge blood test where they took 4ml's of blood (alot for a tiny boy) he had to do a stool test and test how much fat gets processed in his system. This was all in his birthday week. Was very emotional!! We are waiting on the results.
  
  
• Our unit is on the market!!! (Please buy it!) So we are doing little finishing touches around the house and hopefully someone buys it soon.
  
  
• So we are looking for a nice 3-4 bedroom family home to buy! We are spending alot of our spare time looking at pretty houses!
  
  
• We have decided to try for baby #2!! I can't wait for Jydan to be a big brother! Keeping in mind it took us 2.5 years to get pregnant with Jydan. This is why I chose not to put off my nursing degree. I can always take a semester off *when* the baby comes. We aren't stressing about it this time, and just waiting for it to happen, if it happens :)
  
  
• We are also selling one of Tim's cars to buy a bigger family car. We are looking for a holden wagon.
  
  
  Phew, now your all up-to-date! 
  
  
  Going to be a hectic few months ;).