It is okay to not like your children...

It's okay to not like your children.

Yeah. I said it. We all know I'm not mother of the year anyway, but put down the phone to child services and hear me out...

I love my kids. They're bloody great kids.  They're funny, they're fun, they're clever. They're encouraging, they're smart, they complete my life. I could go on, but you get the point. I think my kids are the best kids in the world, like all us mums do.

But

They're stubborn, they can be so damn rude. And the screaming. Almighty God, the FUCKING screaming.  The fighting.  The punching. The competing. And more screaming. And refusing to eat what I've cooked. And the mess!! And how many times do my children need to argue with me about going to the damn fucking toilet before getting the point?

 My daughter has non stopped screaming since she turned 2.5. It's okay girlfriend, I haven't stopped since my labour in 2012. She's making it really hard for me right now. But, I love her. Gosh, I love her. Her smile. Her laugh. Her playfulness. Her conversations. Her cuddles.

When my son turns back into the tired monster child he is when schools on, I wont like him. No-one likes a whinging 5 year old.  No-one. Not even their mothers, trust me. But I still love him with my entire heart! I love that he's learning, and growing, and trying to keep up with all the demands of being a young school boy, and snuggly, and caring.

Sometimes, I just don't like them! Sometimes I created monsters. And when they're carrying on like two headed ones, I just don't like them! And you know what? IT'S OKAY!!!

It took a long time to realise that it's damn okay to think that just sometimes my kids are tiny little arseholes that I don't want to be around.

In saying that, I hate not being being around them. I miss them like crazy.

As cliche as it is,  I would never,  ever, want to be anything else. I couldn't wish to go back in time,  or wish I was something else, I couldn't imagine not being a Mum.  It's my entire life and beyond. It's okay though, to not enjoy every minute of your screaming snotty stubborn argumentative and whiney jerks that you so dearly love.

Those with babies reading this are probably freaking out about now, about what sort of Mum I am. I'm a good Mum. Most of the time. And I was like you once. All full of unicorns and rainbows, and paintings... Do me favour and come back here when your perfect little angel turns 2. Than 3. Than 4.. And when every single age gets harder and harder. You'll be here my love, you'll be here!

For now, peace out ✌.

Harley xx