It's time for me to be a little selfish. It's time for ME. It's time for me to be the best mother I can be and the best person I can. It's time to create myself a home full of love and nurture and a life full of calmness. To breath easier and to smile easier. To lift the weight off my shoulders and realise what's holding me down.
To do the right thing by me.
I'm hoping then I can hold my head high.. or at least a little higher.. small steps at a time. Then hopefully I can move freer and happier and float.
I know if I was someone looking at me, in my situation, what they would be thinking. But it's not that easy. Life's never easy, right?
Life's never dull, right?
Life has to be fulfilling though. Weather you fulfill it yourself.. or you're strong enough to share that fulfillment with someone else.
Scared doesn't even cut it, fear doesn't even seem like a fair word to use. Not knowing what's to come next. Not knowing what to do next. Not knowing what may happen.
For now, I know a few things. A few things I didn't know before. My strength. My determination. And what the reflection of my life is really like - realisation. Knowledge. Knowing what's happening. Knowing what's becoming. Knowing this is MY life. My SONS life. OUR life.
This is the start of our life.
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